Elder’s sour end as family battle over burial
On Wednesday, 19 days after he died, 90-year-old Palai Palai was finally buried.
Considering the bitter dispute that surrounded the build-up to his burial, it’s very unlikely the Mochudi elder is resting.
Claiming her rights as his widow – a title his three children dispute, insisting she was never married to their dad and had been out of his life for 15 years – Lizzy Palai and her family oversaw the burial in Makgophana ward.
The proceedings went ahead despite Palai’s aggrieved off-spring maintaining they served her with a court order the night before postponing the funeral!
Although he is now in the ground, the old man’s kids insist this is not the end, with the two parties due to meet in court again for yet another showdown on Thursday (5 February)
If successful, the children, who are confident they can prove Lizzy was never legally wed to their dad, intend to exhume his body and have him buried beside his ancestors in Boseja ward as they originally planned.
Palai, who passed away on 16 January, was initially due to be laid to rest on 24 January.
However, a day earlier, Lizzy secured an urgent order from Lobatse High Court, stopping his children, Segomotso and Nnaniso Palai, from going ahead with the funeral.
Her attorney, Lesedi Seloka, argued that she was lawfully married to the deceased under Bakgatla customary law in 1988, with two cattle paid as bogadi.
He submitted that as the surviving spouse, Lizzy was entitled to decide when, where and how Palai should be buried.
Seloka accused the deceased’s children of unlawfully taking control of the body and death certificate, excluding Lizzy from all burial arrangements and violating her rights as his widow.
He maintained that the customary union was valid and supported by a certificate stamped by the then Deputy Chief of Mochudi, Pilane. He further argued that customary marriages are polygamous by nature and therefore did not block Palai from having more than one wife.
In response, Segomotso strongly opposed the application, denying that Lizzy was ever legally wed to their father.
In their affidavits, the children stated that Palai was customarily married to their late mother, Nene Palai, in 1970 and that the marriage was never dissolved.
They argued that any alleged marriage to Lizzy was invalid and unsupported by law, insisting their father never paid bogadi for her.
Segomotso told court that after their mother’s death in 2000, their father alternated between staying at their home and Lizzy’s residence.
He further said Palai and Lizzy stopped living together in 2011 and that she played no role in caring for him during his illness, which intensified in 2025.
“Lizzy was never around when my father was ill. We informed her about his condition, but she never came. Even after his passing, she did not come to our home after we broke the news. Instead, she reported us to Kgosi Bana Sekai II of Mochudi, claiming she wanted her man’s body. Please, we are asking to be allowed to bury our father with dignity,” he said.
To their dismay, court issued an interim order halting the burial.
When The Voice previously visited the Palai home in Boseja, tents had been taken down, slaughtered meat lay rotting, and groceries meant for mourners remained unused.
Their dismay doubled on 30 January, when Justice Onkemetse Tshosa ordered Palai’s biological children to hand over the deceased’s body to Lizzy for burial.
Speaking to The Voice at the time, Palai’s first-born daughter, Tsholofelo Bakai, backed by other family members, vowed to continue fighting.
Days later, the family informed The Voice they had filed an urgent application seeking to stop the burial.
Bakai said that on Tuesday evening they served Lizzy with a court order halting the burial, which she and her family allegedly defied.
She said their legal representatives will handle the matter, adding they possess documentary evidence to challenge Lizzy’s claims.
Although he lived for 90 years, it’s unlikely Palai Palai experienced anything like the drama surrounding his death during his long lifetime! And it’s not over yet!
