Travelling in a bus from Selebi-Phikwe to Gaborone last weekend provided an opportunity for Voice reporter, Philimon Mmeso to listen in to a conversation about two women’s brother in law’s strange behaviour at funerals.
German Print- You know I hate sleeping at my sister’s place. If I had money I would book in one of the lodges in Molepolole.
Church Dress- It seems her husband does not want us to visit them. When we arrive in Gaborone we should buy our own food.
German Print- Don’t you think that would be rude to my sister? Let us just eat their food and ignore him. After all he can’t throw us out.
Church Dress- She must talk to her husband though about his weird behaviour, especially at funerals! That man is stingy and selfish. Do you remember when he hid pounded meat (seswaa) in his car during our uncle’s funeral?
German Print- Then the food was short! And to imagine that at the time he was not even married to my sister yet. It was two big bowls of Tupperware full of meat that he hid!
Church Dress- I heard that he later ate it all alone. I wouldn’t be surprised if he fell ill with gout one of these days. That was definitely too much meat for one person
German Print- You will see when we arrive at their house, he will start complaining and shouting at the children.
Church Dress- But then we all know that it will be us he will be be irritable with and taking it out on the children.
German Print- Sometimes I can’t help but think about how he had nothing to his name when he met my sister!
Church Dress- Do you remember that tie and dye shirt he used to wear everyday? ( Laughing and clapping hands) Life!
German Print- ijoo! When I first saw him, I thought my sister had found a herdsman for our father! I was shocked when she announced to the family that he is the father to Thabo!
Church Dress- I suspect that he bewitched her to fall in love with him. A teacher, marrying a driver! No! There’s something that just doesn’t add up about such a union!
German Print- Council drivers travel a lot and to different places. He might have met a powerful traditional doctors in remote areas who gave him a strong love portion to give her! There was no other way my sister could have fallen for that loser!
Church Dress- He tasted chicken for the first time after he met my cousin! Now he wants to turn her against us!
German Print- (Laughing and leaning her head against Church Dress) Hey!
Church Dress-I’m telling you! That is why he likes to hide food during ceremonies when other people have not even eaten!
German Print- You see cousin, I think it is not good to date someone who is less educated than you are.They tend to have inferiority complex.
Church Dress- He is also not used to a lot of food and good food for that matter. Since he grew up not eating well, when he sees many people he automatically thinks that they are going to eat all the food and leave him starving. Poverty mentality is dangerous!
German Print- One day I am going to tell him a piece of my mind! You will see, my sister is going to be the one footing the bill for his sister’s funeral. In my sister, him and his family have found a diamond mine I’m telling you.
They both burst out laughing and clap hands
Church Dress- Don’t worry, I have brought some church water with me in case his family wants to pull a fast one on us. They might be tempted to bewitch us to be married in their family you know!
German Print- You did well cousin. You can’t put anything past that man’s family!
(Takes out the cell phone and calls her sister)
German Print- We have arrived in Gaborone. We will catch a bus to Molepolole. We will call you when approaching Molepolole so that you can collect us from the bus rank.
Church Dress- What did she say? Where is Mr. Food?
German print- She will collect us. Mr. Food has gone to the cattle post to slaughter the beast
Church Dress- Heela! Where there’s food he won’t be left out.
Bus stops at the rank and the two women get out laughing as they continue with their discussion of their brother- in- law and his family on their way to Molepolole buses.