I had a chat with a couple of friends a few days back and we somehow touched the issue of looks and relationships.
We know nowadays that most people try to be modest and say that they are not into looks of the other person but the personality of the individual. A few girls who were part of the conversation did share the very same sentiment that they were not into looks while some acknowledged that they believed the other person’s physical appearance does matter.
As usual I was listening attentively, digesting and analyzing what the two opposing groups had to say knowing that I’d take it to print. Anyhow, those who said looks matter argued that physical appearance have everything to do with determining whether you find yourself interested in a person.
Their argument here was that we all know that for you to look twice at someone, that person needs to have interested you with something, either body, cute face, beautiful big eyes or something that you find attractive. Remember everyone has got their personal preference and again, “beauty does lie on the eye of the beholder” so what I view as beauty, or handsome, might not be the same with the next person.
Some prefer, full figured ladies, some prefer skinny ladies, others tall guys, some short or chubby… However, it is beauty nevertheless and it all has to do with some physical aspect.
On the contrary, if there’s nothing that you like about a person, physically that is, you are less likely to look twice at that person, ke gore o sa kgatlhege le eseng.
Now this lot said you look at the physical first, then if you like, you then move on into the person’s personality and if you are impressed, then something just might happen, and if you don’t like what’s on the inside, you then move on. Therefore its looks first then personality second, not the other way around. But at the end of the day, we all want to have good looking partners.
Then the modest group, the group which was saying looks don’t matter also had a few pointers that got me thinking as well. Now they said that if you are to judge people by their looks or develop relationships because of the other party’s good looks or some physical aspect that you love then your relationship is bound to fail.
It’s as simple as that, no question asked. The relationship might fail a week later, three months later, a year later etc., but it will fail nevertheless. You might get enticed by the looks but dislike the character traits, maybe their personality stinks, their vision doesn’t compliments yours, their ways might disgust you and so on.
Therefore people need not concentrate on the looks but rather more important things that will determine if you complement each other. I must say, even though it’s not advised but I do believe that looks do have an impact on people being attractive to each other, I mean after all we all want to have “lookable” partners.
I for one have a particular preference and if you don’t fit it, then I give you the axe without even giving you chance or finding out who you really are. Maybe it’s not advisable, but most of us tend to do this. What do you think, how do you go about it, is it looks first, then personality or vice versa?